Now, don't get me wrong - I've done many conference presentations, in-class presentations where I was responsible for the class, and a variety of writing workshops and other similar public speaking engagements. I've also read and thought a great deal about teaching and pedagogy through my volunteer work at the University Learning Centre at the University of Saskatchewan (which might not be around much longer because of budget cuts, so that link might break) and through the many articles, tweets, and other materials provided by other academics on the subject.
But, because of either having funding or working research positions, I've never been a TA or lectured a class.
I was recently asked by a colleague to step in and teach her class while she was out of town. The course was on satire, with the lecture that day being about Lady Mary Wortley Montagu's “Verses Addressed to the Imitator of the First Satire of the Second Book of Horace” and Alexander Pope's "Epistle to Dr. Arbuthnot." I was familiar with the works, and the lecture notes were provided, so I basically had to read them and encourage some responses after group work.
Overall, it went all right, but I have a lot of thoughts and feelings...
- It's difficult to separate the feelings of being a lecturer and being a student.
I know how to interact with other grad students, or audiences at conferences. Students, however, are different in some intangible way. The power dynamic between lecturer and student? I'm not sure.
When I'm at the front of the classroom, I sometimes get distracted with thinking about whether I'm giving them the best at any given moment. I've been an undergrad student recently enough that I clearly remember my frustration, scorn, or apathy regarding guest lecturers or just lecturers who didn't do what I considered to be a good enough job, and the idea of being on the other side of those feelings can be very anxiety-inducing, especially when it hits you in the middle of a lecture in front of a class. - Being a young scholar (in age and research) can be difficult.
I'm not even halfway through my twenties yet, and there were undoubtedly some people in the class older than me. Hello, impostor syndrome! I had to fight for my voice to not go up a few notes and to remain assertive and like I knew what I was doing, and, most importantly, to not worry about whether they wondered how this kid has the gumption to tell them stuff. - I really enjoy teaching.
I like sharing information about cool things. I love it when people can construct an idea and an argument. - Audio-visual aids = my best friend
I just went off of the notes provided to me, but I lecture more naturally when I have those sorts of aids to help out. - Group Work
I hated group work as a student. However, after all the work I've done through the ULC and things I've read about pedagogy, I can see the benefit. Also, as a lecturer, the idea of getting up and talking about things for an hour every class? Or longer classes? Let's just say that I'm glad I'm in a discipline where discussion can be easily integrated into a class.
These thoughts are all still swirling around, especially as I only taught a couple hours ago, but I wanted to get them down while still fresh so that, in a couple years when I have more teaching experience, I can revisit them and compare how much I've learned and developed.
